Wednesay... the cause... now where's the cure?

So this morning we got up early to get to Ethan's morning cares. He was still having his episodes. After they talked it over with the Dr. they decided that he might have acid reflux which was causing him to have issues breathing. So they started him on some medication for that and decided to change his feeding to continuous feedings. They were feeding him ever 3 hours and they timed his food so that it would go in his belly over an amount of time like 15 minutes for 18ml. Now they are changing it so he gets 18ml over 3 hours. As the day went on with these changes they said that the episodes were shorter and he recovered from them quicker (meaning he started breathing on his own quicker.) Hopefully this is what was wrong and one of these days everything will come together... the breathing, the eating and the pooping. He's got 2 out of 3 right now!

So I had my first follow up appointment since Ethan was born. I have been waiting for this appointment as I have had many questions. The main one of course was what did I do wrong? What I found out was shocking, disturbing, frustrating, but also relief to know I didn't do anything wrong. What I found out is that I have an incompetant cervix. From what I understand this means that my cervix is not strong enough to hold my uterus as it gets bigger with a baby and it sort of gave out before it was suppose to. Well what causes this to happen? Well come to find out it is from a biopsy I had to have done over 10 years ago. I had an abnormal pap smear when I was younger so I needed to have a biopsy done to make sure that it was not cancerous. Well they did a scraping of my uterus which I learned is also called a leap procedure. From what I understand leap and cone procedures can increase the risk of incompetant cervix's. So of course I was upset because I talked to 3 different Dr.'s about this pregnancy. I talked to my Dr. in Wisconsin to make sure everything was ok because I knew sometime soon we would decide to have kids. She said oh yeah there was no worries (and I believe she was my Dr. when I had the biopsy.) Then I had a Dr. in AZ and the one in MT. Not one of them asked about any abnormal pap smears! Not one of them! Ugh... it is so frustrating to me to find out that this could have been prevented and my baby would not be having a hard time breathing... he would still be growing inside me right now! But then I found out that if I would have had an ultrasound done the week before that they may have seen the cervix starting to give out. Yes, I was at my Dr.'s appointment one week before Ethan was born. Do you know what that appointment consisted of? Oh how are you feeling? Oh here are some handouts of what you might experience in the last trimester? Oh lets hear your baby's heart beat. And that is it. No checking my cervix to make sure everything is ok down there. No ultra sound. So yes this makes me a little upset. So many emotions went through me today. It's frustrating though because there is nothing that I can do about it. Nothing. I can't change anything. Now that we know this about my cervix though there is a way to make it stronger so if we decide to have more kids... a LONG way down the road we should be able to carry to full term. It is a simple surgery where they put a band around the cervix around 16 weeks of pregnancy. He also mentioned that there may be disabilities with it but mothers go on to live their life like normal. Mark asked me what that meant... what kind of disabilities. Good question Mark... yeah I didn't ask! I was so upset about everything else I found out that I didn't ask! I would say I will research it on the internet but the more I do that the more upset I get. I do realize this though... I can pass along this information to other woman. I am definitely not a Dr. but from what I got out of my Dr.'s appointment today I would make sure to point out if you have ever had a biopsy done on your cervix. Make sure to stress the issue. Make sure they watch your pregnancy closely. I also wonder why this isn't part of regular prenatal care. No, I didn't ask. There was just way too much thrown at me in 5 minutes that had my blood boiling. All of this information that I just threw out here is what I know. I am not a Dr. I just want to share what I found out and if it saves a pregnancy then I am happy.

I decided I needed another night with Mark and a little time at home so I started to head that way and realized I should stop to pick up some groceries so I could make us something to eat! I decided omelettes should be on the menu. Ugh... anyone who walked by me in the meat department probably thought I was a vegetarian! I couldn't stop crying as I was picking up bacon and ham for the omelettes! I hope one day people are looking at me in the grocery store because Ethan is throwing a fit.... yes I never thought I would hope for my baby to throw a fit but I do. Just anything normal... I wish for right now!